Intramural Hockey - Where even the refs want to be forwards.

Our team is so old we start sweating while watching the game before us.

The plastic cylinder of life.

Part penalty box, part ref lavatory.

Sean: So...do you guys ever get, you know ... chaffed from your skate?
Jeff: God, I thought I was the only one.
Colin: I use this foot creme. It doubles as a moisturizer, with aloe and vitamin E and the whole shebang.
Sean: Shit, someone is coming. Quick, talk about Ultimate Fighting. *

Billy knew the universe was probably infinite, but part of him still wondered if you could reach thru one end and touch the other. That'd be rad. *

Sean: No, seriously. Pull my stick. *

The team had no issue with Brian touching gloves with his teammates before the game. It was the licking of the glove in-between that creeped us out.

Colin gets the jump on his opponents. *

Hockey asses.

Sean streaks down the court, unperturbed by the opposing players, or the weasel let loose in his pants. *

Sean finally gets his moment in the sun against the infamous Naked Goalie of Isla Vista.

A member of the white team briefly ponders whether or not his designation is racist, and if his participation is an endorsement of oppression.

Billy (quietly): Don't tell anyone, but I've got mice in this tshirt. If they get too close BLAMO, rodent shower!

Logan enjoyed shooting at people's groins. We think it was some childhood trauma involving a bully. We didn't ask.

Ref: Naked goalie, you can do your leg lifts another time. Get up.