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The crowd behind me waiting in line for the keynote. Waldo, apparently tired of always being "found", starts on his campaign to photograph every human on earth.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1370
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I had to stand next to this for an hour and a half. And yes, it was rotating the entire time. Someone said that MSN butterfly was stuck inside. That cheered us up a bit.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1046
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The line in front of me. That means these people got up earlier than 6:40am to stand in line. Well, or they got up at 7 and didn't shower. And I'm not putting that past anybody there.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1205
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(using nightvision feature)
Before the lights on the stage come up, Steve Jobs likes to run around the stage without any pants.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1004
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(displaying the byproduct of his new Gigantor Ray)
Steve: You should see this thing's appetite! Oooh boy, nothing perks you up in the morning like a 80ft tall man biting off the limbs of your neighbor's trumpet playing live-in...
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1013
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Steve: ...and I thought, bam! Airbags. But Phil hated it. And my wife said something about a breast obsession. But shit, I'm the king!
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1264
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The sleeve to a new snowboarding jacket that allows you to control your iPod. Press all the buttons together and it emits a high pitched squeel, summoning an avalanche to sweep away your sorrows.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1028
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Steve: ..and these are the first strike MS targets. Nuclear weapons will be fired within the hour. Don't worry folks, we're not downwind.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1025
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Steve: My boxers are the same pattern. Wanna see?
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1014
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Apple has developed Safari: an application that shows you which way is due north, and how to use that to find the door to your house and get outside for some fresh air away from the sweet sweet internet.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 893
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The 4 iApps from Apple: iPhoto, iTunes, iFigureSkating, and iDVD.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 988
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The Ken Burns Effect adds a little girl in a red jacket to every project. Ken Burns has a lot of kids and he wants you to adopt them. See how cute they are? They can take out the trash, do your dishes, even shovel snow off your driveway.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1025
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Phil Schiller spots an audience member with a 12" subway sandwich. The next few moments would be bloody indeed.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1017
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Steve wishes he had a podium to hide his throbbing erection.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1472
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Steve: What the fuck is this? I give up. I use Linux at home for Christ's sake.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1051
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A screen even Dirk Diggler would be envious of.
Date: 01/13/2003
Views: 1455
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