Billy had the munchies, and Jess' hair clip was starting to look mighty tasty.

Penis straws and red liquor; the two necessary ingredients for the world famous 'bladder infection' drink.

Alex and Andria weren't sure why Sean asked them to say "Ah", but they were positive the "Dentistry for Dummies" book hanging out of his pocket wasn't a good sign.

As Paka meticulously keeps any ice from entering his glass, Shasta daydreams about flying monkeys. Why? I dunno, you'll have to ask her.

The only thing that could ruin Lora's mood was Paka using her glass as a spitoon. Again.

(for the past two birthday dinners of Shasta's, we have encountered a bachellorette party out for a good time.) The bride-to-be enjoyed the attention she was getting from Brian & Wilson. ...{click photo for more}

Shasta: Ohh, what a cutie wootie! Yesh, dat's right. Well Brian Wyan, if you wook down my friend Ashley's shirty wirty one more timey imey, I'm gonna rip of your wittle wiener. Ok?

Paka knew light bulbs weren't edible, but damn, that thing sure was pretty.

While Brian ducked squirts from the penis gun, a bride's maid calmly tried to convince the inebriated bride-to-be that blowing every guy in the restaurant was actually not tradition.

Somewhere, Masi (her real dog) sheds a single tear.

Alex had only two regrets in life: not asking Becky Hilderberg out in the 7th grade, and looking over his shoulder at this exact moment.

Each and every year, Shasta wrapped herself up as a present on her own birthday. We weren't sure why, but it gave us the opportunity to make a lot of "unwrapping" jokes, so we weren't about to complain.

Shasta: Shit! *spits*
What fucker replaced my lime with a snail?!

Brian's Bullwinkle impression wasn't the hit he thought it'd be. He then recounted a story about him and a squirrel he was once friendly with. We don't talk to Brian anymore.

The Cheat, Shasta's number one crush for the past few months, sent Shasta a card with suggestions for what clothes she should wear when they finally met. Shasta was excited until she noticed the lack of any clothing that would cover her below the waist.

Alex: Do you really think that was an appropriate pic Paka? I mean, this is a family restaurant. Now...show me it again.