As Steve downs his water, he savors his last fully formed memory of the night.
Todd downed the beer like a pro. After we told him so, the prostitute we hired got offended and left in a huff.
The view from the hotel room. Screens on the windows cost $5 extra.
The gang - minus the camo, the funky smell, and those three guys that didn't make it out alive.
The serial groper approached, and Alex couldn't move. Or didn't want to.
Steve: ..and then one of those chicks from Hanson gave me a hickey! Ha, it was a crazy round.
What are you laughing at?
While Jake was adept at shooting penis shapes onto rocks, his team wished he spent a little more time firing at the enemy.
Blond kid: For the last time; Yes, I'm in the band Hanson. And no, none of us are woman. Yes, I'm sure.
Mossy rocks made for great cover from enemy fire. The moss, by the way, is not undelicious.
The rain made for a muddy battlefield. And the world's most painful slip n slide.
Motorcycle helmets on sticks were used for target practice. They were, surprisingly, cheaper than pig heads.
Guy (chanting): I'm secure in my sexuality. I'm secure in my sexuality. I'm secure in my sexuality.
After being eliminated in a short round shooting people with his $1000 paintball gun, Sal liked to quietly weep behind his mask.
Morgan: I am a banana.
Paka: Does anyone else feel a slight sting in their upper thigh?
