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Steve: Who wants a stylus? Douchebags, that's who.
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Steve: Orange...Green....Blue. These are the colors of the future. Don't let some little jerkoff like purple come along and tell you different.
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Steve: Glowy Apple!! Run for it!
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Billy Zane (internally): I could fit Ben Stiller in my pocket and take him to parties when I want to impress ladies with a funny facial expression. I like this plan.
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The geeks discuss, at length, which of the founding Steves has more raw sex appeal.
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The future is here.
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Intel delivers a perfectly safe wafer-thin mint to Steve during his exhaustive keynote address.
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Steve hadn't finished going over Apple TV's trailers feature before someone berated him for buying 'National Treasure'.
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Sioux Falls panorama.
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Steve: This thing has a proximity sensor and a shape detector. So don't even think about approaching it while naked. It'll know.
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Because I live for taking a picture of a guy taking video of a guy talking on a cell.
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It's a classic story: you go to sleep one night and then wake up institutionalized next to a man claiming to be a computer. Also, you suspect he's stolen your pants.
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Well, at least the phones were getting intimate.
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Madeline (internal): Why oh why did I drink 56oz of soda before coming here?
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Overcome with a spontaneous burst of energy, the red skirted woman kicked off her shoes, ran forward, and swan dove into the pond below. The fact that it was only 4 inches deep was information she received..far too late.