Steve: Who wants a stylus? Douchebags, that's who.
Steve: Orange...Green....Blue. These are the colors of the future. Don't let some little jerkoff like purple come along and tell you different.
Steve: Glowy Apple!! Run for it!
Billy Zane (internally): I could fit Ben Stiller in my pocket and take him to parties when I want to impress ladies with a funny facial expression. I like this plan.
The geeks discuss, at length, which of the founding Steves has more raw sex appeal.
The future is here.
Intel delivers a perfectly safe wafer-thin mint to Steve during his exhaustive keynote address.
Steve hadn't finished going over Apple TV's trailers feature before someone berated him for buying 'National Treasure'.
Sioux Falls panorama.
Steve: This thing has a proximity sensor and a shape detector. So don't even think about approaching it while naked. It'll know.
Because I live for taking a picture of a guy taking video of a guy talking on a cell.
It's a classic story: you go to sleep one night and then wake up institutionalized next to a man claiming to be a computer. Also, you suspect he's stolen your pants.
Well, at least the phones were getting intimate.
Madeline (internal): Why oh why did I drink 56oz of soda before coming here?
Overcome with a spontaneous burst of energy, the red skirted woman kicked off her shoes, ran forward, and swan dove into the pond below. The fact that it was only 4 inches deep was information she received..far too late.